Anonymity - Egg Donors, Sperm Donors, Embryo Donors, & the Donor Conceived Children
Alot of conversations have been going on these days regarding anonymity in the field of third party reproduction, and I agree that something needs to be done in the US very soon. In fact, the recent case of Doe v. XYZ Company (75 Mass.App.Ct.311) has increased that attention, as it involves a case of a woman who gave birth to twins after artificial insemiantion using donor sperm. The Plaintiff, the mother of these two girls, is asking for both Donor #D237's identity from the sperm bank, as well as child support from the donor himself.
For now, the Massachusetts Court of Appeals has remanded the issue to the trial court but declared "such cases cry out for legislation defining rights of the participants." Unfortunately, without any statute in place, the Court cannot compel the defendant to reveal the identity of the anonymous donor.
As a side note, the Plaintiff has since placed the children in state Department of Children and Families - for reasons not made clear in the ruling.
So, where does that leave us as a society? Many other countries require that the egg or sperm donor's information be released to the child once they are 18 years of age; h0wever, many fear that this will cause the number of donors to diminish as they have done overseas.
My other thought is that these donor conceived children should have some rights in this matter at some point - but how should we as a society handle this? Donation is a positive thing in many aspects, as these children would not be in existence without the donation. How does a donor conceived child respond to that aspect?
On the other hand, if someone is donating their genetics to help someone have a child, why should they be burdened with the obligations of a parent? And, why should people have to give up the right to have a child with the use of a donor just because some people do not agree with it? Julie Shapiro attempted to tackle this issue several times in her blog.
Well, I am currently working to develop my actual opinion at this point, as I was once an egg donor for quite a few couples as a matter of fact (including married couples, gay couples and a single woman). Do I mind if the children want my information? Not at all. Do I want to pay child support? Hell no! I have my own children, who are legally, genetically and socially my children.
On the other hand, I also have twin nephews who are my brother's children legally and socially, yet not biologically. Should he pay for their support? Yes, as he chose to bring these children into this world. But should my donor conceived nephews have access to their donors' information in the future - I think so but intially on a limited basis. Maybe there is a way that we can compromise for all parties, as these children that are donor conceived are certainly loved and wanted.
If the states want to legislate, we need to move towards a system where the donors information is stored for medical purposes and for potential contact in the future if all parties agree. Most egg donors in particular are open to having contact in the future; however, not without being contacted beforehand by me so they can access the situation at the time they are asked.
In fact, my office now offers Information Storage, which will maintain the files for a minimum of 21 years (or longer if requested by the Parties). In reality, we have been offering that service for over a decade, as I have always felt compelled to ensure that this information is available to the children and/or their parents. Maybe this is a compromise that will allow donor conceived children to be born to those families who need to use a donor to have a family, while permitting these children access without obligating the donors legally into support or parenting.
Let me know your thoughts, as I think that a continued discussion will help me develop my opinion, as well as help others with theirs.
