News Alert: There Are 50 States & Michael Jackson's Children Were Born in Only One - California

California is one of the only states that permits the intent of the parent(s) to govern their parental rights, so that the intended parent (or intended parents) are listed as the legal parents on the birth certificate, regardless of biological connection, so long as this intent is formalized in an agreement/consent.

 

I, like all of us, have been intently watching the news involving Michael Jackson and his children, yet what amazes me is that lawyers on TMZ and other national news outlets are declaring that Michael “never formally adopted the children.”  Therefore, he must not be the father of these children…..And, they then ask, who are the parents of these children?  

 

Well, guess what?  He is the father – no adoption required in this case no matter if he is the biological father or not, which appears to be the case for all three children.  In California, surrogacy law is very clear as to who is the parent, regardless of biological connection, based upon intent.  We can only guess at the facts in this case, but a birth in California with a surrogate, egg donor and sperm donor, will not affect his rights to these children, or the rights of his children to his estate.  The only uncertainty is the fact that he was married to Ms. Rowe at the time of the birth of the first two children.  She may certainly have a claim if she remains on the birth certificate, again even if an egg donor was used. 

 

What people have to remember is that almost all people have the desire to be a parent, even Michael Jackson, so we need to remember his intentions to be a father, instead of focusing on the drama surrounding these children.  Let’s hope they can move forward without their father in their lives and become successful adults without the media making it worse

 

See more on Channel 10 News and my interview here.

 

 

Friday Legal Updates - Donor Offspring, IVF Blunder in UK, Michigan Embryo Legislation & More

Well, another week has come and gone, but for those of us who are Americans, next week is the 4th of July, which means family celebrations for most.  Today, I want to tell those who are still longing for a family of their own that there is hope.  Be patient, get educated, and hang in there. 

Now, onto the updates:

Iowa - Dead Iowan Father's Child - will his daughter receive survivor benefits.  In a case similar to the one that I addressed here in California last week on my blog, her mother is trying to fight for Social Security Survivor Benefits for Byrnn, now 6, conceived through IVF two years after her father died.  Again, this result is based on 150 year old Iowa law, as in the California and Arizona case, but her mother is challenging the decision - and she intends to take it all the way to the US Supreme Court. 

My take on this - make certain estate planning documents are in order for the future use of your genetic material, although it would not have made a difference in this particular case. 

Michigan - Michigan Lawmakers Prepare Bills to Monitor the activities surrounding the donation and destruction of embryos.  The one bill in particular is called the Embryo Research and Fertility Clinic Transparency Act (Senate Bills 647-652)

New York - Fertility Authority has received investments totalling $500,000.00

"7.3 Million Americans struggle with fertility issues and are looking for quality information and support that only www.fertilityauthority.com provides. The $4 Billion fertility industry is without a "go-to" source for accurate and up-to-the minute content. FertilityAuthority.com was launched on February 25, 2009 and has not looked back. CEO Gina Bartasi says, "Our goal has always been to provide the best fertility content on the web, and users are recognizing the quality of our site. Investors have witnessed our early success and want to be a part of our future growth."

The funds will be used to enhance the site's technology, boost revenue capabilities, generate additional content and continue to aggressively build traffic. Bartasi has not ruled out an institutional raise adding "Our clients are asking us for custom websites, online appointment booking software, expanded video content and additional technological innovation that will help their businesses grow. Our focus is to serve their needs and exceed their expectations". New clients that have already put their confidence in FertilityAuthority.com include several prominent regional fertility centers as well as specialty pharmaceutical firms Columbia Laboratories and Ferring Pharmaceuticals. "

United Kingdom - Why Am I Dark, Daddy?  Another IVF blunder in the UK haunts another family. 

"When ten-year-old Michael Williams climbs into his father Keith's arms for a goodnight cuddle, he will often ask the same dreaded question: 'Why am I brown?' Looking up into his father's blue eyes and taking in his light brown hair and fair skin, his son will then ask: 'How can I make myself lighter, like you?'

Keith doesn't know how to answer these questions, so he'll make a joke about how Michael was delivered by a stork or that he was found under a gooseberry bush. Anything to avoid having to tell him the truth.

For the reality is that not only was Michael conceived via IVF using donor sperm, but there was a terrible mix-up when the wrong sperm was mistakenly used by the hospital fertility clinic the couple attended in their hope of becoming parents. "

Canada - Canadian Donor Offspring has created an initiative in response to the lawsuit filed by Olivia Pratten back in October of 2008.  The site is an attempt to fundraise on her behalf, as well as others in her situation.  The site is located here.  What are your thoughts on this issue?

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Egg Donor Anonymity & Privacy & the Reality of the Google World

I spent the evening last night finally spending some time reviewing some fertility blogs and websites.  I was actually surprised by some of the "promises" that were being made to egg donors in relation to their donation of their eggs to recipient parents.  In fact, some claim that the information is shredded once a donation is over and/or their information is not released to other agencies or clinics.  I am not really certain how that protects the privacy of the donors in all situations. 

I think it is important that those in this industry make certain that we advise egg donors that we cannot ever completely guarantee privacy and anonymity.  Yes, the clinics follow the HIPPA rules for the most part, and my office falls under attorney-client privilege rules; however, no one can absolutely be guarantee any privacy.

Why, you may ask?  Because when an egg donor fills out her profile, she wants to make certain that some of her accomplishments, etc. are highlighted.  By doing so, she makes herself searchable via Google or now Bing.   Even when a donor places limited information on her profile, the advent of Facebook, Twitter, My Space, and Google make it very hard for any of us to stay hidden for long. 

Well, with this in mind, what is my advice?  Just be prudent with your information and understand that you can be found - BUT, and this is a big BUT, is unlikely to happen in the near future.  Specifically, it is unlikely that the Intended Parents will try and locate you, although it is always a possibility. 

Now, what about the resulting child?  What if their parent shares the information with them as they get older to satisfy their curiosity or they find the profile in a safe?  Disclosure is becoming more common, as we all know in this industry, and donors need to be aware that this can occur. 

Should you as a donor be concerned?   Well, I can tell you from personal experience that it is not such a bad thing.  I was located, and I am fine with it, as the family did not expect anything from me, except that they were happy that I am there if there is a medical need.  No relationship beyond that, and I have no legal responsibility to these children.  But, as a donor, I do believe that I have a personal ethical responsibility to be available for information in the future.  I am not afraid of the choices that I made, even though I was not advised of this when I donated, although this was in the advent of this entire industry. 

In summary, the purpose of this article is not meant to scare away egg donors, as they are desperately needed by families who cannot have families without them; but as a donor, be aware, be prepared and go into this with your eyes wide open to the future.  Educate yourself and know what you are agreeing to while knowing the wonderful gift that you are providing a family. 

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RESOLVE Advocacy Day June 25th : Why Me? Why Now?

Today we are in a unique moment in US history where the future of healthcare reform is being discussed in the halls of Congress. Together we need to make sure that the leaders of this discussion hear firsthand what those touched by infertility need in our healthcare system. There's never been a time in RESOLVE's 35 year history where we need you more than we do today. Grab your spouse, partner, best-friend or mom and join us June 25 in Washington D.C. Stand up and be heard.

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Friday Legal Updates - Sperm Donation & Conference Reminder

Well, it is Friday again - TGIF to everyone.  Not alot on the legal front this week, despite the continuous chatter about the IVF blunders over in the UK, as I commented on this week in my blog entitled Embryo Mix-Up, Resulting Abortion, and Adequate Justice?.   But, I do not want to beat a dead horse, so today's singular topic is sperm donation.

California - The Ninth Circuit has determined that posthumous conception DOES NOT entitle one to survivor benefits.  In a case involving a 10 year old girl, her mother was trying to get Social Security Survivor Benefits for the girl who was conceived via sperm extracted from her just deceased husband in 1995.  

"The 9th Circuit Court of Appeals ruled Wednesday the child, Brandalynn Vernoff, was not dependent on her father at the time of his death. In California, dependency is determined by the parent-child relationship rather than the marital status of the parents, according to the decision."

Further, the article stated, "

James Raetz, one of Gabriela Vernoff’s attorneys, said California has a system set up to protect sperm bank donors, and this case is an unintended consequence of the law.

Bruce Vernoff’s sperm was removed after his death, and there was no evidence of plans for a birth after the father’s death, according to court documents.

“That’s the big distinction,” Raetz said. “The court really hung on that.”

However, Raetz said, the couple did have plans for a baby.

“No matter what, she’s a single mom trying to raise her daughter,” he said."

Interestingly, I did not in another blog on this issue, that in Arizona the result may have been different

"In California, dependency is determined by the parent-child relationship rather than the marital status of the parents, according to the decision."

"While her appeal was pending, the Ninth Circuit decided Gillett-Netting v. Barnhart, 371 F.3d 593 (9th Cir. 2004), which held that a set of posthumously-conceived twins were the deemed dependents of their biological father and entitled to survivor benefits.

The administration subsequently issued an “acquiescence ruling” to the decision, noting that in the Ninth Circuit a child must be biologically related to the insured and the insured's child under applicable state law to be a deemed dependent.

Writing for the appellate court yesterday, Senior Judge Cynthia Holcomb Hall explained that Gillett-Netting was based on Arizona state law, which recognizes "[e]very child [as] the legitimate child of its natural parents," but that California law does not equate natural parent status with biological parenthood."

"So, Gabriela tried to invoke "equal protection". After all, Bandalynn would have "rights" in Arizona she doesn't have in California, and other children in California get survivor benefits, but the court didn't go for it. "

What are your thoughts on this one?

Also, don't forget about registering for our conference - Erickson Law and Conceptual Options, a Center for Surrogacy & Egg Donation Announces European Conference on Surrogacy & Egg Donation  at http://www.surrogacy-eggdonation.com/geneve.convention.html

The American Fertility Association & The Frozen Embryo Dilemma

With so much in the press these days about donor anonymity and how to handle that in the future, I wanted to post an article from the AFA that also talks about how to deal with the future issues in ART.  Enjoy, and let me know your thoughts!

"A Matter of Privacy, Responsibility and Choice

It’s a private issue gone very public. It’s a complex web of personal philosophy, religious orientation and social conscience about which everybody, and we mean everybody, has a strong opinion. But the fact is, and should be, what you do with the frozen embryos you don’t use is your decision and yours alone.

Of course it never feels like the quite right time to discuss this touchy topic.

Maybe you’re taking your first steps on the infertility treatment path. Along with all the mind-numbingly complicated instructions, you’re handed a form asking you what to do with excess embryos before you have a single one.

Maybe you already beat the odds. With absolute devotion, you danced the assisted reproduction tango, created viable embryos and made a baby. Or two or three. Your family is complete. Your head is bursting with school, soccer, recitals and bedtimes. Frozen embryos?

Or maybe you’ve given up on treatment, leaving behind the heartbreak, the disappointment and possibly, a few fertilized eggs. You’ve moved on.

So chances are pretty good that those embryos, protected in liquid nitrogen, aren’t at the top of your to-do list. None of us who have experienced infertility anticipates having any embryos, let alone extras. After we’re done with ART, we tend to ignore or deny the delicate question of disposition of the unexpected surplus.

At some point, though, all of us with cryopreserved embryos will have to make a final and forever decision about them. It’s not easy. They’re our unique responsibility and our unique burden. Because while our embryos remain suspended in time, we don’t.

Hence, this fact sheet, a guide to anticipating some of the quandaries we confront and exploring the choices we have.

The Options

A good initial cryopresevation consent agreement usually outlines three disposition choices:

  • Thawing without intent to transfer. Lucinda Veeck, M.L.T.,D.Sc., Director of Embryology at the Center for Reproductive Medicine and Infertility in New York City, says at her program, 53% of the 364 patients who have gone through with their choice have elected this option.
  • Donation for research. While raging controversy and federal limits have restricted directed giving to stem cell research, there are myriad other well-accepted research initiatives, such as staining for DNA and genetic analysis that rely on embryos. And despite the ban on federal funding for stem cell work, privately funded institutions are moving forward. Reports Dr. Michael Alper of Boston IVF, one such center, “There is no shortage of donations.
    At CRMI, Dr. Veeck reports that about 41% of patients have gone the research route.
  • Donation to other infertile people. Logistically and emotionally complex, donation for transfer has its own guidelines established by the American Society of Reproductive Medicine. It’s a many-layered effort by both the donors and recipients, requiring a six-month quarantine of the embryo, blood and genetic testing and retesting of donors, blood tests for the recipients. Both parties must sign informed consent documents addressing relinquishment and acceptance of parental rights should children result, as well as liability, among other things. Whether or not it is an anonymous transaction, both donors and recipients are strongly urged to get psychological counseling.
    “We’ve only donated embryos from two patients because of the difficulties inherent to follow-up testing,” remarks Dr. Veeck. “And in the 6% group desiring to donate, most have not actually given away their embryos yet.”

How Was I Supposed To Know?

These days, even before there’s an embryo, there’s the consent form. That daunting document demanding that a patient know, ahead of time, what to do with remaining embryos…if there are any. For infertile people, that’s one incomprehensibly huge “if.”

So hopeful patients fill in the blanks with the best intentions. The rub is that when it actually comes time to act on that initial agreement, people often find that first choice isn’t the one they want after all. It’s important to remember that first consent form is not the actual disposition form. You can shift gears at any time.

Changes of heart happen for a million different reasons: divorce, the death of a spouse, economic hardship, a multiple birth after the first cycle. Sometimes the partners in a relationship simply aren’t on the same page – one may want more children, the other has no interest. One partner may see the embryos as their potential children, the other regards them as left over sperm and eggs.

Inevitably, life’s constant evolution leads to embryos that sit, sometimes for an embarrassingly long time.

“People have them frozen and then forget about them,” says Dr. David Hoffman, Medical Director at IVF Florida/Reproductive Associates in Margate, Florida. “But they still don’t want to get rid of them. I don’t think patients think of a frozen embryo as a person, but it’s tough to let go.”

Dr. Veeck adds, “Many patients respond by doing nothing. They continue paying for storage fees rather than make a decision. And I think that’s the appropriate thing until they’re quite sure what they want to do.”

Behind the Choices

The language of disposition seems straightforward and precise. In fact, most people are sandbagged by how profoundly affected, confused and conflicted they are when it comes time to commit.

So, most elect to do nothing. Make no mistake; doing nothing is making a decision. Endless postponements means someone else-a family member or the clinic—may get stuck on the horns of what is rightfully your dilemma.

Overwhelmingly, frozen embryos are intended for use by the couples that created them. But IVF centers around the country report that the sheer number in storage is putting a squeeze on space, with some embryos in residence for a decade or more. Increasingly, centers are attempting to contact patients who haven’t been active for several years. It can be an onerous and difficult task, and on occasion, pointless.

At CRMI, Dr. Veeck puts the abandonment rate at about 10%. That’s after three registered letters, using search agencies and making countless phone calls.

Not all clinics have the wherewithal or the intention of going to such lengths. But most clinics will not dispose of embryos without an explicit, legal go-ahead from patients.
For the most part, says Dr. Hoffman, “couples usually pop up out of nowhere” when they’re notified that unless they respond, the embryos will be discarded.

Contrary to all the hype, Dr. Hoffman notes there are “very few not spoken for. The government thinks there are huge numbers out there. But there aren’t a lot of abandoned embryos at all.”

In other words, the vast majority of us with excess embryos are left to wrestle with our personal convictions and moral codes.

What Gives Meaning

For some people, contributing their embryos to research in an effort to help others gives them a sense that their assisted reproductive efforts have lasting value. “It’s a way of giving back to medicine and it makes them feel good,” says Dr. Alper of Boston IVF.

For others non-viable thawing provides closure. “It’s interesting, but people are very relieved when their embryos are discarded,” observes Adele Kauffman, Ph.D., and program psychologist at Reproductive Science Center in Waltham and Boston. “Embryos in the freezer are unfinished business. Once it’s done, they feel they’ve come full circle.”

Still others, impelled by altruism, empathy, or religious beliefs to help other infertile people, want to offer their frozen fertilized eggs for transfer.

“Initially, I thought it would be the option everyone would choose,” says Dr. Veeck at CRMI. “But when they think that they might have offspring out there and not know them or how they’re going to be brought up, they usually reconsider.”

In a recently published article, Dr. Craig Syrop at the University of Iowa Hospitals and Clinics, notes that

Of 365 couples with embryos stored after two years, 12% “indicated a willingness to donate to other couples (was) nearly equal to the desire of couples to donate to research.” But, he finds, when faced with the “reality of clinic visits for counseling, STD testing, and informed consent before embryos are donated and utilized” interest wanes and research outstrips donation to others by nearly 2 to 1.

The Donation Drama

Embryo donation for transfer is a media magnet, drawing tremendous attention when some began referring to transfer donation as “embryo adoption.” It is not.

“Adoption is a specific legal framework with specific guidelines around parental rights and obligations and applies to only living children,” says Susan Crockin, a Boston area attorney specializing in reproductive matters. She calls donation for transfer a “positive, but limited” option. She notes that five states have laws on the books dealing with this form of embryo donation, but nowhere is it the legal equivalent of adoption.

While the federal government is on the cusp of launching public education campaign advocating “embryo adoption,” Crockin calls it a misnomer that may make people feel good but “glosses over the legal reality.” At a minimum she recommends a legal agreement between donor and recipient; and consider, in those states without an embryo donation law, that the recipients go to court to have themselves declared the parents of a resulting offspring to avert the risk of custodial claims by the genetic parents or the extended family.

However, things blur on the psychosocial front where, psychologists say, the adoption parallel is stronger.

Embryo donors and recipients should expect that resulting offspring will want information about their genealogy, their genetic makeup, and their biological parents. Donors must be prepared for the possibility of a knock on their door one day even if the transaction was strictly anonymous. As decades of experience with adoption have shown, kids will come searching. Furthermore, laws protecting anonymity are subject to change.

“We’re in uncharted territory here,” said Dr. Elaine Gordon, a Los Angeles psychologist. Dr. Gordon says she’s getting more inquiries about embryo donation for transfer but many go nowhere.

“They find it too complicated and overwhelming in terms of what’s required,” she observes. “If they’re going to do it right, does it mean engaging in a relationship with the recipient couple and do they want to participate in that?”

She suggests that “responsibly done” ovum donation might provide the best model, with both parties entering into a “contract detailing terms of contact, if any, and information disclosed and exchanged. If the two parties can come to a meeting of the minds, the exchange can take place, facilitated by psychological, medical and legal experts.”

Embryo Donation Programs

There are several embryo donation programs, including the Christian faith-based agency, Snowflakes, that promotes “adoption.” At the root, all the programs facilitate matching donors with potential recipients and work through the details of the exchange.

“We’re a private (non-sectarian) agency and we liaise between the recipient and the donor,” explains Eileen Dover, executive director of Genesis Family Services in Holly Pond, Alabama.

Recipients send in a $100 application fee, list their requirements and are put on a waiting list until the right match pops up. The total agency cost to recipients is $1,800 but they’re also responsible for shipping, donor medical testing, notary feels, and a flat $250 attorney fee. Donors, who also can specify requirements for a receiving family, fill in a standard questionnaire, including medical history. Genesis’ simple-language but comprehensive contract requires adherence to the ASRM guidelines, but the agency leaves that to the donor’s doctor.

While Genesis doesn’t require psychological counseling, the contract calls for recipients to pay for up to three sessions for the donor, if the donor chooses. Dover also says, “we ask recipients to get counseling as well, but that’s their responsibility.”

Genesis advocates closed donations but will go with client’s wishes for open ones.

“We try to encourage transferring four embryos,” says Dover. “If you have 10 embryos (eggs that are fertilized, frozen but haven’t started dividing yet), you may get four to six that live through the thawing process. If they’re blastocysts (5-day-old embryos), there’s a darn good chance they’re going to do well and I don’t think any physician would do more than two or three.”

In Fullerton, California, Snowflakes operates on the assumption that this is an adoption. “In our program, we focus on the end result which is the child. That’s the same in all adoptions,” says JoAnn Eiman, a Snowflakes spokesperson.

The Christian faith-based agency requires recipient families undergo a homestudy, a fundamental process in traditional adoption, but controversial in embryo donation for transfer. As Eiman explains it, about 20% of the homestudy is about child abuse and Department of Justice background checks. “The other 80% is preparing the parent for a non-genetically linked child,” she says. The agency does both closed and open donations, depending on the preferences of the parties.

Snowflakes fees to recipients are about $4,000 for the matching, legal contract, shipping, coordination, rematching if required and lifetime support.

Begun in 1997, the first Snowflakes baby was born in 1998. In 1999 there were a couple of matches but no births. But by 2002 there were a total of 18 babies born and this year, Snowflakes expects another 23.

Do donors who’ve gone this far change their minds? “Most don’t but it happens,” said Eiman. “Typically when the donor couple gets a profile on the adoptive family they say ‘Oh my goodness, this is real. They’re going to take them and raise them.’ When they get the packet that’s when it hits them.”

It’s a whole new world, agrees Dover at Genesis. “It remains to be seen whether (donors) really get that they’re going to have children out there. They say, ‘Yes, I understand.’ But what’s going to happen 20 years down the road? I think about that when I’m whiting out the records and I think someday someone might want to look at that.”

When It’s All Too Confusing

Okay. We’re all pretty clear that the “what is to be done” with extra frozen embryos is at best confusing. The American Fertility Association strongly urges that you weigh the following to help ease the strain:

  1. Nobody has control over your embryos but you.
  2. You are not obligated to stick with your first decision or your second or third. The no-turning-back point comes only after you’ve formally and legally relinquished ownership of your embryos.
  3. Know that it is absolutely fine to wait as long as it takes for you to make the decision that feels right for you. No government, social or religious entity should force you into taking an action that, in your gut, you know is a personal mistake. Because you will have to live with this decision forever.
  4. Donating to other couples is a real and generous alternative. The AFA recommends you thoroughly explore the legal, psychological and emotional implications and potential long-term ramifications. You must feel confident that you can deal with the possible outcomes down the road.
  5. Thawing without intent to transfer is a perfectly reasonable option that most couples do choose, finding it provides the unexpected relief of closure. Yes, there may very well be grief and counseling or support that can serve you well.

We at The American Fertility Association will continue to report, write and provide you with as much information about this topic as we can. But, as one of the leading patient advocate groups, The AFA is always available to you, to answer questions, provide support and referrals. Please call our toll-free number (888) 917-3777. It always helps to talk with those who’ve been through it, too. "

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Donor Anonymity - What Do You Think?

I read this great blog post by Donor Concierge, and I was impressed by the woman's candor.  I wanted to share this with all of you as Gail has done and get your thoughts on the subject.  As I have also been a donor, I have no problems allowing the children to have contact with me in the future in order to discover who they.   I am not willing to have any relationship beyond that, but I am willing to share with them any information that may help them in their own journey through life.  What do you think?

"Egg Donation: Why I gave up my right to remain anonymous
By Laura Witjens, Chair of the National Gamete Donation Trust, egg donor and mother 08 June 2009

Following a change in the law that came into force on 1 April 2005, British people conceived using donated egg, sperm or embryos can ask for identifying information about the donor when they reach the age of 18. Here Laura Witjens, egg donor and mother of two, writes about why she elected to remove her anonymity and potentially become identifiable to any children born from her donation.

I'll never know what made me watch breakfast television that morning. Being a single working mother with two one-year olds, it was a luxury I could ill afford. But I did, and one of the items changed my life forever. The same day, I contacted a fertility clinic and told them I wanted to be an egg donor.

It was the year 2000 and discussions about the removal of anonymity from egg and sperm donors were only just taking place between patient groups and other fertility organisations. For me, at the time just a willing and partly-informed donor, the notion of being known to any resulting offspring wasn't even a blip on the radar. The counsellor who I saw at the clinic was satisfied I knew what I was doing and, other than the known medical ones, no other long-term implications were discussed. Some months later the deed was done: 13 healthy follicles were harvested and I left the clinic with the feeling I'd done something momentous. Just how momentous, I only found out years later.

Not satisfied with the information available, as well as certain parts of the process, I made another life changing step. I contacted the National Gamete Donation Trust (NGDT) and asked if I could volunteer. I became a Trustee and, motivated by the pending removal of anonymity and differences of opinion with other Trustees, I went on to become the Chair. It's a position I've held for the last six years and in this time I've taken part in many gamete donation discussions.

I firmly believe in leading by example, a philosophy I carry through to my work as a business woman and as Chair of the NGDT. So, with such an emotive subject, how could I lead an organisation without putting my money where my mouth was? If I truly believed in the identity of the donor being disclosed to the donor-conceived person, the legislation at the time of my donation shouldn't have been relevant to me. I knew that re-registering as a known donor with the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority (HFEA) might be futile, since the family created out of my donation would never realise that their donor was willing to be known. Still, it was a matter of principle for me, and one that required substantial soul searching.

I asked myself the many questions that many donors in my position might ask: Can I empathise so much with these people that I'm prepared to open my door, my life, my family at a time that suits them? At the same time, can I be distant enough and accept that whilst I am prepared to make important steps towards that person's wellbeing, I will never find out if indeed they are well? More importantly, how would my children deal with this? They had absolutely no say in my choice to become a donor, but it's known that many donor-conceived people are more curious about their half-siblings than their donor. In other words, it wouldn't be me they were after; they would want to meet my own 'flesh and blood' children.

Through the NGDT I had access to donor-conceived young adults, donor conception parents and various fertility professionals. But not surprisingly the act I was contemplating was, and to a large extent still is, uncharted territory. It seemed no one could help me find the answers I needed. As not just a donor but also heading the NGDT, I did not just want to accept it - I had to wholeheartedly support and embrace it.

My answers came through my children. By then my seven year old daughter and son were developing into individuals with their own quirks, traits and habits. I divorced their father when they were one and remarried when they were four. In other words, I have my own social experiment going on with twins fathered by one man, raised by another.

My children have taken on habits from both men. Unlike donor parents, however, I know where this comes from and can share that with them when appropriate. This may seem rather trivial from the outside, but I know from experience that it does matter to them.

I donated to help other people less fortunate than myself. I went through weeks of unpleasant injections and examinations, believing I was doing the right thing. 'Doing the right thing' has been my drive through all of this: being a donor, leading the NGDT, raising awareness. And now doing the right thing means giving the children I helped to conceive access to information about me.

I have since re-registered and am happy to make myself available to the child born out of my donation. If I can help to give them understanding about themselves I will gladly help. It may seem like a little thing, but I know from experience it could mean the world to them
."

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Embryo Mix-Up, Resulting Abortion, and Adequate Justice?

Well, in case that is catching alot of media attention involves a couple who went back to their IVF clinic in the UK to use their last remaining embryos to create a second child.  The reports are as follows:

"A couple who were having IVF treatment when their final embryo was implanted in another woman by mistake said today they might use the compensation they received to try for another child.

The couple, from Bridgend, south Wales, who have a six-year-old son and are identified only as Deborah and Paul, won a legal battle against the IVF Wales clinic, in Cardiff. The woman who received their embryo was told of the mistake shortly after it occurred and decided to terminate the pregnancy.

Deborah and Paul said they would consider trying for another child but it would be two years before they seriously thought about attempting another cycle of IVF treatment because they were not "emotionally ready" after the blunder by the Cardiff and Vale NHS trust.

They turned down an offer of another round of IVF treatment by the trust free of charge after the mix-up and reiterated today that they could never return to the trust because they had lost faith in its staff and procedures.

Nine embryos had been created using IVF in 2000, and Deborah, a 38-year-old hospital worker, subsequently gave birth to a son.

The remaining embryos were stored until 2007, when she and her husband, a 40-year-old print plant manager, decided to try for a second child. One of the embryos had survived and they travelled to the clinic for treatment, only to be told of the mix-up.

Deborah said the couple had been hoping to provide their son with a sister. Describing the moment when they were told about the mistake, she said: "We felt absolutely devastated. Both of us got very tearful.

"We just wanted to get out of there. The actual mention of the termination part of it really upsets us because we tend to think of the embryo as the little boy that we have got because he was from the first batch of embryos."

Paul said: "It took some time afterwards for it to sink in. We decided then we wanted to investigate and we wanted a full report. They were supposed to send us an investigation and they weren't sending anything. That was when we involved a solicitor to look into the case and investigate it."

The causes of the blunder remained secret until lawyers obtained reports into the incident. Documents acquired by their solicitor, Guy Forster, showed that the previous year there had been "near misses" because of problems in monitoring the ownership of embryos."

As you can see the couple is devasted, and the age of the mother, who is now over 40, now works against them retrieving potentially new embryos.  Many are also debating whether the woman who became pregnant should have aborted.  Should she have agreed to be a surrogate mother for this couple?  I don't know - considering she was trying to get pregnant herself.  This is not an ideal solution in any stretch of the imagination.  What are your thoughts?  What should that woman have done?

As for the courts, they awarded the couple $50K according to reports.  Is that enough to compensate this couple?  Is any amount enough to compensate this couple? 

All I can say is that I feel deeply sorry for both couples - no one is a winner in this mess. 

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Friday Legal Updates - India Surrogacy, Stem Cell Research, Surrogacy Abroad & More

Hello, and it is Friday again.  TGIF!  I have included a few interesting, yet informative stories that I think you will find to be thought provoking.  I am also including another link to our upcoming European Conference on Third Party Reproduction in Switzerland.  All are welcome!

Press Release Here and Link on Our Web Page 

Salt Lake City, Utah - the fate of Anthony, who is a boy who has been at the center of a legal battle between his biological mother, a traditional surrogate, his father (intended & biological) and his adoptive parents.  It looks like the justice system has worked this one out for the benefit of Anthony.  What do you think?

New York - New York Stem Cell Research Plan is being bashed relentlessly - many cite that women are being exploited by their eggs being used for research.  The claim is that these eggs are also being fertilized and/or being used for cloning.  Yes, egg donation for any purpose is a serious decision that one should only make after careful deliberation; however, I am on the fence on this one.  Anyone care to educate me on this one?

West Virginia - Lesbian moms can keep foster child - ruling confirmed.  The court was originally against the "untraditional" family; however, it looks as if they are allowing them to maintain custody at this point - although they are unable to adopt as a couple (only one can), as same sex couples are not permitted to do that in WV.  Actual opinion here.

Poland - A thirty two year old Polish woman agreed to be a surrogate mother, changed her mind but feared a legal battle and has since relinquished the child.    This is a scary prospect that we all need to think about before going into any of these arrangements, whether you are the surrogate or the parents.  Know the laws before you proceed!

London/India - As another reminder of preparing before moving forward in this area of family building, a couple from London spent a great deal of time in  India in a lengthy legal battle trying to bring their twins home

Another article listed here also provides those interested in surrogacy overseas to be careful, or you may risk losing your children

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Erickson Law and Conceptual Options, a Center for Surrogacy & Egg Donation Announces European Conference on Surrogacy & Egg Donation

San Diego & Los Angeles, CA June 10, 2009 – Erickson Law, a boutique law firm specializing exclusively in third party reproduction, and The Surrogacy & Egg Donation Center at Conceptual Options, LLC announces their European Surrogacy & Egg Donation Conference to be held in Genève, Switzerland July 29-31, 2009.  “We realized there is a need in the European community for information on the process of Third Party Assisted Reproduction in the United States, which is why we are holding this conference to raise awareness throughout Europe.” states Theresa M. Erickson, Surrogacy Lawyer, CEO and founder of Conceptual Options. 

“A substantial portion of our clients are located outside of the United States and with the recent events in the fertility world, we felt that an information seminar to explain this process was in order.” states Surrogacy Lawyer Erickson.  

The Surrogacy & Egg Donation Conference is aimed at informing the European community on the possibilities that exist in the United States for family building.  The topics to be discussed include explaining the process of third party assisted reproduction, as well as helping alleviate the uncertainty of the journey, such as medical insurance issues, obtaining birth certificates and passports, citizenship issues, and taking your baby home.

The keynote speaker at this conference will be Surrogacy lawyer Theresa M. Erickson.  Ms Erickson is a globally recognized expert in this specialized area of law. Attorney Erickson is also involved in this community by volunteering her time for Resolve and AFA, while sponsoring events that promote awareness outside of this field.  She is also the author of Assisted Reproduction, the Complete Guide to Having a Baby with the Help of a Third Party. Her next book is currently being finalized for publication.

“The first step is to get your own thoughts in order,” states Michel Tournay the International Case Manager for Conceptual Options.  “If you are still unsure of how to proceed or where to look, ask questions, questions and more questions. We will show you what you need to build a team of professionals so you are not alone in your journey to building your family!” according to Tournay.

In fact, according to Tournay, “We understand your need for privacy and confidentiality, which is why this is a private informational conference.”   All information regarding attendees will be kept in the strictest of confidence to ensure you remain anonymous on all levels. 

For additional information on The European Conference on Surrogacy & Egg Donation please contact Michel Tournay at 001-858-748-4222 or visit our website.

About Conceptual Options, LLC & Surrogacy Lawyer Erickson

Conceptual Options was founded by Theresa M. Erickson, Esq. in 1999 and has been integral in all aspects of the fertility community and in helping build families through surrogacy, egg donation, embryo donation and sperm donation for couples and individuals across the United States and the World.  “All families are traditional; some just take alternative paths by using surrogacy, egg donation, embryo donation and sperm donation to become a family.”